Thinuri Senarath Yapa - 03 Jan 2024
Merry & Mindful : Embracing Wellness this Holiday Season
For many, the holidays are not a seamless tapestry of happiness; they're a mosaic of emotions, with patches of struggle and silent battles.
Heal Lift
Healing begins when you choose to take care of yourself and begin to self-love
Have you ever come across tales of ancient yogis practicing meditation or vipassana in the Himalayas? While the Why-s of their spiritual quest is deeply personal, the How-s are a perfect outcome of self-mastery. Don't get me wrong. You absolutely don't need to become a saint in order to hone the skill of self-mastery. Before we dig deeper into understanding the impact of self-mastery in our lives, let's try to look at the idea of what self-mastery actually is.
Discipline. Control. Will. Direction. Focus. Purpose. A multitude of words that are often referred to as synonymous to Self-mastery. Each of these acts as a building block in laying the foundation of self-mastery, and thus, cannot be just used interchangeably.
What exactly is Self-mastery?
Think of it as a balanced diet.
Weird? Let me explain.
What did you envision when I asked you to imagine a balanced diet? Probably, a blend of carbs, fats, preferred choice of protein, fruits, and vegetables. All in fixed proportions.
Self-mastery is when you are able to nurture a strong self-will that controls your desires thereby helping you stay focused and disciplined towards one or more goals that you have aimed at.
In the context of a balanced diet; say, your goal is to lead a healthy lifestyle free of ailments that have been bothering you for some time. And, you have been completely dedicated to eating balanced nutritious meals. But, what happens if you lack self-control? You might go overboard on portions. Or, remain inconsistent with your meal times. The outcome then will likely be counter productive. Self-Mastery is about learning all of what it takes for you to remain focused on eating balanced meals and not giving away to distractions to achieve a healthy lifestyle.
Why is there even a need to consider Self-Mastery?
Every time someone talks about the notion of self-mastery, we are often left questioning the need for it. And, rightly so. Why would we consider eating clean and healthy when a burger from McDonald's sounds more enticing? A healthy meal would also mean more work and who'd actually do it everyday when ordering in becomes more convenient?
Self Mastery is staying determined towards a certain direction irrespective of whatever is being thrown at you. The challenges could be physical, financial, emotional, or circumstantial. Self-Mastery is making a choice and training the mind to stay aligned with that choice by following it up with relevant action. Staying focused on healthy eating requires self-control, consistent effort and the will to not deviate. A burger gives you instant gratification but results in bloating and poor gut health overtime. You are also likely to feel hungry again in a shorter span of time. When you are exchanging that with a bowl of piping hot home cooked meal, you are signing up for a holistic healthy lifestyle that very much includes happiness and inner peace.
Enough about food. Let's talk about an athlete. Any athlete winning his game gathers immense applause. But what we don't realize is, it has taken them hours and years of practicing self-mastery towards their craft. Hundreds of failures that couldn't break their determination or consistency towards their goal. This automatically reminds me of the famous quote by ace former basketball player, Michael Jordan.
"I've missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I've lost almost 300 games. Twenty-six times I've been trusted to take the game-winning shot and missed. I've failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed." - Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan's resilience is a true testament of his self-mastery skills.
Success is no magic pill to be swallowed overnight. Success comes to those who are skilled in self-mastering their bodies and minds towards their goals.
Every human being experiences life in their own unique way. I might feel happy, content, and successful after securing a 9-5 job. You, on the other hand would rather want to be scaling your start-up in order to feel the same. This is why self-mastery isn't uniform. You and I cannot walk the same path to achieve the same feelings. Happiness, Inner peace, and Success are highly subjective. There's no single blueprint that can be followed. Even when the goal is exactly similar. A lot of people want to climb the summit of Mt. Everest, but how many actually can? It's not like you get a dream you are climbing a mountain, and you set for it the next day. There's a whole process of physical and mental training which my friend, is the skill of self-mastery. The result: Unbound happiness.
How is Self-mastery linked to Emotional Regulation?
I want to run a marathon but have never run a race in my life. I could start training, or simply give up on it because of fear. The human brain is likely to make emotional decisions because these emerge out as reactions. For example, the fear of failure was an immediate reaction to the idea of taking part in a marathon. Self-mastery comes into play when I am able to sit down with my emotions, accept them, and reflect based on rational thinking. Yes, I am afraid of failing but what if I don't? Or, what if I reconsider my goal to reach the finish line instead of having to 'win' it? Or, I could start running and leave mid-way if I am unable to continue.
How to Emotionally Regulate?
Understanding your Goals
Goals are largely subjective. While someone might want to reduce weight for their acting auditions, you might want to do so to remain fit. Trying to compete with someone else's goal will nullify your process of self-mastering. Hence, self-awareness and self-reflection are crucial.
Acknowledging Different Emotions
Feeling a range of emotions is absolutely valid. You were supposed to be attending an important event but it started raining heavily. While you have now booked a cab, the traffic is at peak. You find yourself consumed in anger, frustration, and disappointment. Accept the emotional upheaval but don't give way to breaking into an act out of impulsion.
Monitoring your Thought Patterns
A close friend got an offer letter for a job you had equally worked hard for while you didn't. You stand despised and can't seem to enjoy the company of this friend anymore. Time to monitor how your thought patterns have been negatively impacting the relationship.
Focusing on the Positives
When setting a goal or making a decision, our minds are more likely to be bogged down by negative realities. It then becomes imperative to consciously hand-hold our minds in focussing on the positive resources. When thinking of joining a gym, you might back out considering it is expensive or you require a particular brand's athleisure. Instead, you could just start working out at home itself wearing your loose clothes, and once you have saved enough, a gym membership could be easily purchased.
Conventional success is not the best parameter to judge self-mastery. An employee might be killing at his job but feeling absolutely hollow within. A good salary hike, a luxury car, and branded clothes will easily grab everyone's attention but not the absence of happiness and inner peace. This is why Self-mastery is the secret sauce in leading a fulfilling life. Becoming self-aware about one's needs, learning about one's capabilities, focusing on the desired goal and deciding to walk the path to achieve the goal without getting carried away by hindrances is all about self-mastery. You cannot avoid hindrances. You learn to overcome them.
Self-mastery helps your mind, body, heart, and soul to come into alignment. It builds perseverance, and boosts self-esteem. You learn to live life in the present. You get to discover insights about your own self.
You can choose to become a saint or a stunt artist. Self-Mastery doesn't make a bias. It is for everyone who wants to be, feel, and live an enlightened life.
When I am not writing, I am definitely overthinking! : )
Last update: 2023-06-20
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Provided that you comply with these Terms, Heallift gives you a limited, non-exclusive, non-transferable, and non-sublicensable license to download and install the App on your personally owned or controlled mobile device or computer. You are allowed to use the App for your personal, non-commercial purposes. Heallift retains all rights to the App that are not explicitly granted to you in these Terms. You may create a reasonable number of backup or archival copies of the App, but copying the App beyond that is prohibited. In addition to the restrictions mentioned, you are not permitted to:
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Last update: 2023-06-20
This Privacy Policy describes how https://heallift.com ("Heallift," "we," or "us") collects, uses, and discloses information about you when you access or use our websites and mobile applications (collectively, the "Services"), as well as when you contact our customer service team, interact with us on social media, or otherwise interact with us. This policy does not apply to subscription eligibility information we receive and process on behalf of our enterprise business customers and partners (referred to as "Customer Data" in the applicable agreement), but it does apply to your use of the Services regardless of your subscription or account type.
We reserve the right to modify this Privacy Statement at any time. If we make changes, we will notify you by changing the date at the top of the policy, and in some situations, we may provide you with additional notice (for example, by adding a statement to our website homepage or emailing you a notification). We encourage you to read the Privacy Policy anytime you access the Services or engage with us in any other way to stay aware of our information practices and the options available to you.
When you register for an account, participate in interactive features, fill out a form or a survey, enter a contest or promotion, make a purchase, communicate with us through social media sites, request customer support, or otherwise, we collect information. Examples of the information you may provide include your name, email, password, street address, payment method information, moods and reflections you provide during check-ins, feedback and survey responses, and other information about you included within your messages to us or otherwise provided via the Services. Some users also provide health-related information in connection with providing feedback or other messages to us, and we process that information consistently with the purpose for which it was provided.
We collect the following information about you when you use our Services.
We gather usage information whenever you use our Services, such as the sessions you use, the audios you listen to, the screens or features you access, and other similar forms of usage information.
When you make a purchase or return, we collect transaction information such as product description, price, subscription or free trial expiration date, and transaction time and date.
When you use our Services, we gather standard log files that contain the type of web browser you use, app version, access times and dates, pages seen, your IP address, and the page you visited before navigating to our websites.
We gather information about the computer or mobile device that you use to access our Services, such as the hardware model, operating system and version, device IDs assigned by your device's operating system, and mobile network information (such as your connection type, carrier, and region).
We may record phone or video calls with your permission on occasion, such as in connection with our coaching program or when you give us feedback or market research.
Based on other information we have acquired, we produce some information about you. For example, like other platforms, we use your IP address to determine your device's approximate location. We also use your initial name to make an informed guess about your gender, and information about your behavior to assist in determining the chance that you will continue to use our Services in the future.
We collect information through a variety of technologies, including cookies and web beacons. For further information, please visit our Cookie Policy.
We also collect information about you from third-party app stores where you install our app or purchase a subscription, as well as names and contact information from third-party calendar services. Furthermore, if you register or log into your account via a social media service account, we will have access to some information from that account, such as your name and other account information, in line with the authorization processes established by that social media service. Finally, we may collect information about you through public sources, marketing and advertising partners, consumer research platforms, and/or business contact databases.
We utilize the data we collect to:
We disclose information about you in the following ways, as specified in this Privacy Statement or at the time of collection:
We allow third parties to offer statistics and show adverts on our behalf throughout the web and
in mobile applications. These entities collect information about your use of the Services and other websites and
online services using cookies, web beacons, device identifiers, and other technologies, such as your IP address,
device identifiers, web browser, mobile network information, pages viewed, time spent on pages or in apps, links
clicked, and conversion information. Heallift and others may use your information to analyze and track data,
gauge the popularity of specific content, present advertising and content tailored to your interests on our
Services and other websites and online services, and better understand your online activities.
You may block advertising cookies by using our cookie options manager.
Heallift is situated in the United States and processes data there, which may not provide the same degree of privacy protection as your local state.
You can edit your account information (such as your password, name, and email address) by signing into your account or contacting us via our Help Center at support@heallift.com. If you desire to deactivate your account, please email us at support@heallift.com, but keep in mind that we are obligated or permitted by law to maintain some information. We also keep cached or archived versions of your information for a set length of time.
You can unsubscribe from Heallift promotional emails by following the instructions in such emails or by going into your account. We may continue to send you non-promotional emails, such as those about your account or our ongoing business relationships if you opt-out.
We deliver promotional and other push notifications to your mobile device with your permission. You can turn off these messages at any moment by altering your mobile device's notification settings.
We honor the exercise of the right of access or deletion for all of our users, regardless of their location, subject to specific legal limits and conditions. This right may be used by any Heallift user by contacting us at support@heallift.com.
If you use our Services while in Switzerland, the United Kingdom, or the European Economic Area (collectively, "Europe"), the parts below apply to you.
We will process your personal information under the following circumstances:
We keep personal data for no longer than is required for the purposes for which it is processed unless relevant law demands longer keeping.
You have the following legal rights, subject to certain limitations and conditions:
If you want to exercise any of these rights but are unable to do so through the Services or your device, please contact us as described below.
Please contact us at support@heallift.com if you have any queries regarding this Privacy Policy.